 For
most people, the word "mentor" is defined as "trusted
counselor or guide." But, for one young woman, the word simply
means "Kristin."
Kristin Eickhorst of Cedarburg and
Mindy Donald of Fredonia have been matched through the Big Brothers
Big Sisters of Ozaukee County program since Mindy’s mother died when
she was 4 years old. Mindy is now 18, and theirs is one of the longest
relationships in local BBBS history.
The Big and Little Sisters have had 14
years of life experiences together. Eickhorst’s influence has helped
Mindy develop into a successful, cheerful, bright and capable young
woman. "All I remember about the earliest years is that my older
sister (Brittany, now 22) had a Big Sister and I wanted one,
too," Mindy says with a smile.
Eickhorst wasn’t actively seeking
this level of volunteerism, but her attention was drawn to an
advertisement for the BBBS program. "It was just one of those
things," the vivacious Eickhorst says with a shoulder shrug.
"I was single, had a house and a good job and felt this was the
right thing for me at the time," she says. So at age 25, she
applied, completed the program’s interview process and was matched
with Mindy. Eickhorst remembers that their first meeting included the
little girl bringing out a tea set for a pretend tea party.
Mindy’s dad, John Donald, says the
girls’ involvement with their mentors helped him, as a single parent
deal with the "girl things" that he didn’t have background
to handle. "I thought I was this big macho guy and could take
care of everything once their mother passed away," Donald
recalls. "But, I found that there were things that I needed some
help with."
Having no family in the area, a woman
from his church suggested that Donald check into the BBBS program for
his daughters. "My children are the No. 1 priority in my
life," he says. "I checked out the program thoroughly and
was very pleased with how they did background checks and went through
the match process."
During the earliest years of their
relationship, Mindy spent many weekends with Eickhorst. "It was
great that Kristin would take them for the weekend. They really bonded
and it was a very nice match," Donald says, adding that Eickhorst’s
help allowed him to spend time with the girls’ older brother.
The Little Sister says the weekends
were fun. "We’d just hang out and go shopping and to the
movies," Mindy says. "She really spoiled me!"
Mindy says her Big Sister helped her
explore the "girly girl" side of life. She remembers that
she was really shy as a younger child, but Eickhorst’s outgoing
personality helped her overcome that.
Mindy also enjoyed spending time with
Eickhorst’s similarly aged nephew doing kid stuff with a fun-loving
adult companion.
Eickhorst has always been there for
Mindy — and for Brittany, too. There were many weekends when both
girls had sleep overs with Eickhorst. Brittany’s Big Sis traveled
and wasn’t as readily available as Eickhorst. "I’d show up to
get Mindy and there’d be Brittany (Eickhorst pantomimes a very sad
face) and so I’d just say, ‘Come on!’" she laughs.
And when Brittany’s mentor died
unexpectedly, Eickhorst without hesitation became her official mentor,
too.
Mindy expresses gratitude to Kristin
for helping her father at a difficult time in his life. "It was
really hard for my dad," she says. "Kristin took some of the
burden off his shoulders. I learned so much both from my dad and from
her."
Even as Eickhorst’s personal life
changed, she and the Donald girls continued to be buddies. In fact,
Mindy and Brittany were in Eickhorst’s wedding and continued to
spend many weekends with Kristin and her husband, Warren. As the
Eichhorsts welcomed sons Alex and Matthew to their family, they
continued to include the girls in their family activities.
But as Mindy became more involved in
school activities and work, their times together decreased. "In
the beginning, we were together every single weekend," Eickhorst
says. "Then, when she was a teen and busy with her life, I think
she was a little afraid to say that she wasn’t able to get together.
I had to say that it was OK if I didn’t see her all the time. But,
at first, when she wasn’t there, I thought to myself, ‘Well, what
am I supposed to do?’"
Their joy in being together is very
evident. Both speak glowingly of each other. Of her Little Sister,
Eickhorst says, "I can’t believe how she has come through
everything in her young life and has always made good choices. She’s
more mature at her age than I am at my age!"
Now that Mindy is 18 and an adult, the
relationship has outgrown the auspices of the BBBS program. But the
two women will continue their friendship on their own terms. "Now
we can get into trouble and no one will care!" Eickhorst says
jokingly.
Mindy looks forward to having Eickhorst
continue to be an important part of her life. "To say that she
has spoiled me is a huge understatement of all that she has done for
me."
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