Upward
advancement in a competitive company can feel like a
race with bumper cars at the fair. Every “player” is
careening around the track, ricocheting and banging into
one another as they race to the goal. The winner is
generally the one who can swerve to avoid all the bumps
and smash-ups with the other competitors.
The
winner at work is also the one who generally can
navigate through stressful situations and potential
conflicts to emerge the winner. The most aggressive and
self-centered usually end up revving their wheels in so
many conflicts, they can’t seem to make much career
headway, even if they have a flashy education and big IQ
horsepower.
Success at work takes more than ambition and brains. The
higher one climbs, the more persuasion, compromise and
tact play a role. It takes the ability to influence
others. You can call it developing your “Brand,” or just
plain developing a “good reputation.” The outcome is the
same: if people want to follow you and work with you,
it’s an indicator you can move up the leader ladder.
I’ve
been in the room countless times when an executive team
will be debating about who is fit to fill an executive
vacancy. When it comes down to who will get the job,
discussions move beyond skills and experience to
interpersonal and personal characteristics. After all,
they have to not only be smart and experienced, they
have to be able to get things done with fellow
executives and through those who report to them.
If you
were a fly on the wall, here are some reputations that
can cause your career wheels to spin:
* They
don’t fly cover for their team (or conversely, they are
overprotective and see their staff through rose-colored
glasses).
The
best leaders know when to be the buffer - even the
protector - of their teams. They defend their results
and stick up for them when they are wrongfully under
fire. But they have no illusions - if one of their
employees is not performing the way he or she should be,
they don’t make excuses for the person. They aren’t
blindly loyal. They know how to balance the needs of the
business, the team and the individual.
* They
don’t collaborate well with peers.
They
act as if their function is the only car in the race and
if they dent and smash other cars along the way, so be
it. Over time they lose influence - even if they are
brilliant - because colleagues don’t trust that their
motives are for the good of the business. Their
self-centered agenda or the trail of damaged personal
relationships create too much wreckage in the road to
advancement.
* They
don’t create followership.
Their
eyes have been on the prize and they have forgotten they
have to cultivate a motivated, committed workforce
behind them. They have “managed up” very well - keeping
those above them informed, making stellar presentations,
having strategic ideas. But when the surveys go out and
the employees weigh in, there seems to be some frame
damage under that shiny paint job.
Some
of the good, talented employees may have left, or are
toiling away without much visibility. Good employees
have transferred out of their department. Complaints
have surfaced in Human Resources. Morale is low and
dissatisfaction is high. The would-be executive has been
busy building his own career on the backs of the people
doing their best to keep the department running. Or,
conversely, they have been micromanaging every last
detail, so that their results position them for personal
success.
* They
have some personal characteristics that raise doubts.
Perhaps they talk more than they listen - interrupting,
lecturing, or just needing to think out loud. If they
can’t solicit ideas and opinions from others, their
careers could take a detour. Or, perhaps they act like
the smartest person in the room. Their brilliance can
carry them far, but if they think they are too smart to
ask for directions, they can end up getting pushed off
the career track and never understand how they lost
their way
Email
your question to Joan at
info@joanlloyd.com
and visit
www.JoanLloyd.com to search an archive of more than
1500 of Joan’s articles. Contact Joan Lloyd & Associates
(414) 354-9500.
Performance
discussions can include personal behaviors
May
20, 2013
Dear Joan:
I was
promoted to Customer Service Manager. of a small group
that used to be my co-workers. One of them constantly
sighs, moans and makes noises and comments under her
breath. She had a bit of a giggling fit this afternoon
after discovering a huge mistake another Customer
Representative made. This was taken personally after
that Customer Representative found out the error she
made.
This
person is very touchy and has a tendency to fly off the
handle easily. How do I approach her about the noises
and comments?
Answer:
It's
not easy managing your former peers. Where there was
once friendship and camaraderie, now there is the
authority factor. Where once you talked about the boss,
now you are the boss. If you grumbled about a co-worker,
now you are managing that person. Not to mention you are
new at leadership, too!
I'm
glad to see you aren't turning a blind eye to the
behavior in this case. Some managers have the mistaken
notion that they can't discuss anything they can't
measure. Not true. Inappropriate behavior is observable,
and therefore, measurable. It can have a profoundly
negative impact on the performance of the team - and
needs to be addressed.
The
Customer Service representative you describe seems
immature at best. Laughing at a teammate's mistake is
unacceptable. You will not be able to build a highly
functioning team with her sniping from the sidelines.
Trust and respect are foundations of teamwork and it
won't grow if she continues to be disruptive and
critical.
Her
moans and comments under her breath are also out of
line. If she is that unhappy, she needs to find
something she enjoys, and not undermine the environment
with her constant negative prattle.
This
CR may be touchy and fly off the handle easily, but it
is no reason to shy away from addressing this. In fact,
that very reaction can be something you also talk about.
Accepting coaching and feedback can be part of the
mature, professional behavior you expect at work.
So
here is a template for the meeting. I have painted a
worst-case scenario. Hopefully, she will listen and
change, but it often doesn't go that way ... :
In a
private place (not a restaurant), open the meeting with:
You:
“Janice you don't seem happy in your job.”
Janice: “What are you talking about?”
You:
“I often hear you moaning and muttering under your
breath. In fact the other day, I overheard you say
(insert an example). I don't think you would be saying
things like that if you were happy.”
Janice: “I'm happy. I just am like that. I always talk
to myself.” (Expect her to deny or deflect your
question.)
You:
“If you're happy, that's good. If you don't enjoy your
job, life is too short to spend it in a job that you
don't like. However, some of your recent behavior has
been signaling that you aren't happy. For example, when
you mutter to yourself or make comments that are
negative (insert the example of the giggling at a
coworker's mistake) it pulls the whole team down. It
also doesn't reflect well on you.”
Janice: “What are you talking about? I'm not negative.
It was just a joke.”
You:
“Let me give you some specific examples of how this
hurts you and the team. When you made negative comments
about Sue, she was very offended and it felt like you
were glad she made a mistake. No one wants to feel
ashamed or mocked when they make an error. I'm sure you
wouldn't like it. When you mutter to yourself, moan or
roll your eyes, it's not only distracting, it's
unacceptable. I am trying to build this team-and I
expect each of you to be respectful and helpful with
each other.”
Janice: (yelling and/or crying) “I can't believe I am
hearing this! I work harder than anyone else on this
team. They aren't always nice to me, either, you know!”
You:
(calmly) I am not talking about them right now. I'm
talking about you. If they are not treating you with
respect, that's something I will address, but for right
now, I'm talking about the behavior I want you to
change.”
Janice: (yelling, standing and getting ready to storm
out of the room). “This isn't fair. I hate this place
and I hate them!”
You:
“Sit down. This is the response I hoped I wouldn't get.
I had hoped I would have a heart-to-heart with you and
you would be more reflective and at least make an
attempt to listen and change. I have to tell you that if
this behavior continues ... or if you walk out of here
and make comments to your co-workers - threatening, name
calling, or anything else - I will take this to the next
step and I would give you a disciplinary warning. If it
continues, you could lose your job. I'd like you to go
home and think about our discussion and come back
tomorrow morning and let me know how you are going to
change your behavior.”
This
is a worst case scenario. Usually a frank conversation
with consequences is the two-by-four the person needs.
The choice is hers. In my experience, coddling her
because you fear her reaction, or ignoring it and hoping
it goes away, only makes it worse. Trust me on this one:
if she does leave-or you end up asking her to leave-the
rest of the team will thank you -and respect you.
Hopefully, she will turn her behavior around, so in
either case, you have nothing to lose by confronting it.
Joan Lloyd is a Milwaukee-based executive
coach, organizational & leadership development
strategist. Email your question to Joan at
info@joanlloyd.com.
