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Funerals
are among the most expensive purchases consumers make. A
traditional funeral can easily cost more than $6,500,
not counting cemetery costs, which could add $2,000. For
most purchases, that’s a price point that warrants
extensive research and comparison shopping. But for
funerals, that rarely happens.
It
should, said Joshua Slocum, executive director of the
Funeral Consumers Alliance and co-author of the new
book, “Final Rights: Reclaiming the American Way of
Death.”
“You
might hear at a funeral home, ‘How can you put a price
on how much you love your mother?’ Well, that’s
true. But turn it around and think to yourself, ‘If I
spend according to how much I love my mother, I’d be
bankrupt,’ ” Slocum said. “You need to remember
that this is not just an emotional transaction. It’s a
business transaction. We can’t show how much we love
or respect the dead by how much money we spend on
them.”
Although
the funeral business doesn’t usually change much from
generation to generation, some new trends are worth
knowing about, to plan an appropriate funeral and to be
a smart consumer.
TRENDS:
—Cremation.
Nearly 37 percent of all Americans who died in 2009 were
cremated, according to the funeral industry’s most
recent statistics. That’s up from 25 percent in 1999.
Cremation
is becoming more socially acceptable, even by religious
groups, and it can cost a lot less than a traditional
burial. Many people choose cremation because they and
their extended family don’t have roots in the same
area. Family cemetery plots make less practical sense,
said Bob Arrington of Arrington Funeral Directors in
Jackson, Tenn.
—Alkaline
hydrolysis. Everybody has heard about burial and
cremation, but the funeral industry is in the very early
stages of introducing a third option, alkaline
hydrolysis. Instead of disposing of a corpse with burial
decomposition or cremation incineration, it essentially
uses lye to chemically dissolve body tissue.
The
resulting brown liquid is essentially poured down the
drain. Bones are then ground to an ash and can be kept
by the family. It’s not yet a common offering, and
some states require legislation to make it legal. But it
could become a more mainstream option likely to cost
less than a traditional burial; more on par with
cremation.
Some view
it, derisively but somewhat accurately, as “flushing
Grandma down the drain.” It’s likely to be
controversial for a while, but it’s no more “icky or
disgusting” or less dignified than bodies decomposing
in the ground or being “burnt to a crisp,” Slocum
said.
—Going
green. There’s growing interest in “green”
funerals, experts say. It is one of the motivations
behind the funeral industry considering alkaline
hydrolysis, which has a smaller environmental footprint
than burial and cremation.
Green
goes for burials, too, but funeral homes have different
ideas about what constitutes an eco-friendly burial.
Slocum said his definition of a green burial would
exclude chemical embalming, which most times isn’t
necessary anyway. It would not include a coffin or
casket, just a shroud or simple biodegradable box, like
cardboard. He would eliminate a concrete vault for the
grave.
“There’s
a push out there among some in the industry to make
green burial a premium-priced product that appeals to
our snobbish side,” Slocum said. “What’s a green
burial, really? It’s about what you don’t buy.”
—Personalization.
A traditional full-service funeral usually includes
embalming, public viewing and graveside ceremony.
“In a
lot of areas, that’s far from typical anymore,”
Slocum said. “People are moving the ceremony out of
the funeral home and into places like parks and banquet
centers,” Slocum said, adding that such events usually
don’t involve a display of the body.
“People
are figuring out that they don’t need to hire an
undertaker at traditional prices to have a memorial
gathering.”
—Tech
solutions. Funeral webcasts are becoming more of an
option. They’re useful for a variety of reasons.
Perhaps a
woman lives in Seattle and her uncle died in Tennessee.
Her employer won’t give her several bereavement days
off for an uncle’s death so she can fly to the
funeral. But she might be able to watch the funeral
online, Arrington said.
Some
funeral homes offer memorial websites. Grave headstones
could come with a Quick Response (QR) code, those small,
square, black-and-white bar codes you scan with a
smartphone application.
A code
might take you to a memorial Web page that might include
a biography of the deceased, a family tree and photos,
for example.
“They’re
trying to find ways to service this younger generation
that is so in tune with apps and smartphones,”
Arrington said.
SOUND
ADVICE:
—Prepare,
not prepay. The single most important thing you can do
regarding your own funeral is to have a clear and
specific conversation with loved ones about what you
want in a funeral. It’s not to benefit you but to
benefit survivors.
“It
breaks your heart when people are struggling not just
because of the death but because they don’t know what
to do,” Arrington said, adding that consumers make
better decisions when they are unemotional and have time
to deliberate. “Just planning will save you money.”
Consumer
groups, including the Funeral Consumers Alliance, say
planning is key but paying ahead isn’t, because too
many things can change and go wrong through time.
One-third of the complaints to the consumers alliance
are about prepaying for a funeral, it says.
But
funeral directors generally disagree.
Although
it’s true funeral homes get the money upfront, which
is good for them, consumers can lock in funeral costs at
today’s prices, Arrington said.
“Prepaying
is an excellent tool for consumers,” he said.
See if
you are persuaded by arguments against prepaying, at
http://www.tinyurl.com/prepaidfunerals.
—Know
your rights. Consumer rights regarding funerals are
dictated by federal law, called the Funeral Rule. Find
details at http://www.tinyurl.com/funeralrule. Among the
rights you have are price quotes by phone, a printed
price list and the ability to pick only items and
services you want and can afford. You don’t have to
choose a bundled package.
—Compare.
Most consumers don’t comparison shop for funeral
products and services. That could be a mistake. Slocum
contends that a sampling of prices from 10 funeral homes
in the same town is likely to vary by $2,000 on the
exact same funeral. Nowadays, you can even shop for
caskets online.
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